After rushing like wild animals to get all our stuff on the
bus (the poor busboy did not know what hit him when he had to make all our
stuff fit) Steven and I took our seats. We had bags of food, 1 liter of Coke
each and our pillows – we were ready for this 7 hour trip down to Phuket.
Everyone boarded and we sat back as the bus started to move
– ready to watch the on-board entertainment. The movie started playing and we
made ourselves comfortable with our pillows and our seats, and then *%
LIB^&%$%^ !@*#%$^) ib(*^$#P))
T^RTR%$DE%$D^G*HT^&%E%GN(G^%R%$D%F&U^F&GIJOIOPOIUMYU^&$#W%WER&*
. Yes you read it correct. It roughly translates to “sorry that you are a
farrang, this is a badly dubbed movie and you won’t be able to understand a
word of the next 3 movies that will entertain everyone else except you all the
way down to Phuket.”
So Steven and I decided that maybe this will be a good time
to catch up on some sleep. And since the seats in front of us were open he
moved to the front and we made ourselves mini beds. Sleeeeeep – didn’t have
much of this underrated human need the last week. Well it seemed like a good
idea. But apparently the lady in the row next to us also did not enjoy the
movie and decided to phone her mother, brother, sister, best friend, less best
friend, random person 1, random person 2, her mother again, her brother again,
some people she forgot to phone and just for shits and giggles she phoned a
couple of people that she did not know. If there is one thing that Thai people
have a lot of it is airtime. They can talk for hours on the phone –
NONFU@#$KINGSTOP!!! And the problem was that she made sure that she could
actually speak louder than the soundtrack of the movie (which is designed to be
loud enough to hamper any conversation you might try to have).
The person that sat behind us either enjoyed the movie or
the phone conversations very much since it (we could not determine if boobs
with a moustache were male or female) gave a loud laugh every 10 seconds on so
while it was stuffing its face with more food that can be consumed by an entire
army.
So with the LOUD movie, L
O U D cellphone conversations and LLOOOUUUDDD
laughing Steven and I gave up on sleeping and resorted to starring out the
window whilst eating our chips and sweets and drinking our liters of cool
drink. Now as you read this you should probably know that this was not such a
great idea – the human bladder is not designed to hold a liter of cool drink
while the body that it is in is being violently shaken by a bus with bad shocks
and a bad driver. And here where we could not determine if our ears or bladders
was worse of. The bus has to stop somewhere….right?
Well it did – 4 hours later. For 15 minutes. Now if this
teaching thing gets too much for us, Steven and I will start our own magic
show. Somehow we got to each smoke a cigarette, release the entire Zambezi
river, buy food and be on the bus before anyone else – amazing much? WE KNOW.
The rest of the trip was pretty uneventful –except for one
guy that somehow got all the food that EVERYONE else (including us) on the bus
ate into his stomach and decided it is probably a good idea to get rid of it by
ways of VOMITING Who the f*!@#& vomits for 2 hours non-stop?! And the two
babies on the bus also did not enjoy the sound too much so they harmonized
The-loud-crying-baby song together.
So except for loud conversations, bad food, vomiting, crying
babies, weird-language-movie, bad bus driver, bad shocks, and short pit stop
and 7 hours on the road we enjoyed the aircon VIP bus trip down to the island.
Here are some photos of the hotel that we stayed in for the
first two nights:
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